This is for my two dear friends who hate museums and boring history. We’re heading to Boston ( my favorite city) soon and I wanted hit the highlights without boring them to tears:
Revolutionary War: America’s Fight for freedom vs. Britain.
King George: King of England. Never set foot on American soil. Punk.
Paul Revere: All-around bad ass.
George Washington: Virginian-born (not ‘Virgin’), general of the rebel army, 1st US president.
Rebels: Today’s average American.
Redcoats: British peeps with bayonets.
Underlined words: Locations we’ll see. SO MEMORIZE IT. Or I will push you into the cranberry bogs.
America…it’s been around forever, right?
- No. Lots of peeps were here before us, but we act like that never happened
- Columbus found this place when he sailed the ocean blue in 1492 (ie Florida)
- Then the English set-up shop via the Mayflower in 1620 (re: the Plymouth Rock south of Boston)
- Who? Mostly, English Settlers that were adventurous or looking to find religious freedom made their way to America–BYE, Church of England
Everything was gravy untilll….
- Stuff went down. Re: The Stamp Act (1765). So, Britain said, “Hey, we want your money and you can’t say anything about it so suck it.” Colonists were like, “WTF?”
- Enter no taxation without representation (ie Colonists had NO say in what money Britain took from them)
- 1770–Colonists are pissed. Britain sends soldiers to get the colonists in line and it gets out of hand when British soldiers kill five colonists for NO DANG REASON (Boston Massacre at the Old State House)
- Paul Revere gets SUPER patriotic and starts getting rebels (colonists/Americans) super pumped about hating the British
Can you pass the sugar?
- Fanueuil Hall–A place where all sorts of town meetings happened. It’s also where they talked a lot about taxes, because Britain was greedy
- 1773–Britain sends tea (per usual) to America and rebels say, “Screw you.” Tea, meet the ocean. Enter: Boston Tea Party
- “Oh snap. It’s on,” says Britain
- 1775–Americans readied themselves for the British to crash the party
- Lanterns were to be hung in the North Church to let citizens know if/how the British were arriving. “One if by land, two if by sea.” PS: They hung two lanterns
- Battle at Bunker Hill: The British won this early battle in the war but Fun Fact: it was actually mostly fought on Breed’s Hill
Seventeen. Se.. se.. Seventeen. Se..se.. Seventeen Seventy Six.
- Our Founding Fathers created the Declaration of Independence (re: 1776…July 4th-ish)
- America says, “Bring it on, Britain pansies”
- And it’s on. George Washington begins the fight in Boston and tried to hold down the fort with a bunch of stinky Americans (men didn’t like showers or laundry…that was women’s work). He set up shop at the Wadsworth House near Cambridge
- Battle of Yorktown: Defining moment because we crushed the British. The war was pretty much over after this point. Yay! This happened in Virginia, so yeah. We won’t see that
I know I didn’t catch everything so comment on any history highlights I missed. Get ready, Boston-Here we come.